Joel's Birth Story: From the Mom's Perspective (Part II, Active Labor)

You can read Part I here: http://babybunte.blogspot.com/2014/02/birth-story-from-moms-perspective-part.html

Shannon had said when I moved into active labor, I would feel a shift--that I would know it when I felt it. On our way home we stopped at Sonic to get a milkshake and some famous Sonic ice, thinking I might like to suck on the ice to stay hydrated during labor. I had texted my doula, Hunter, to update her on my progress. I mentioned that I might like her to come over to keep me company and offer encouragement after my mini-meltdown. I didn't know how quickly things would get going, so I told her to get her kids dinner and to bed and come at her leisure.

Contractions were coming more frequently, lasting longer, and were more intense.  We got home around 6. I texted my chiropractor and asked him to come to the house. I expected it to be a long night and the adjustment I had earlier felt so good, I wanted another one. Dr. Mick got to the house when I was in the middle of a pretty significant contraction. I finished and told him he had about 3 minutes before another one hit and he needed to work quickly. After the adjustment, he prayed for us, then another contraction hit. I have no recollection of him leaving because I was on the floor working my way through it. I texted Shannon and told her that I wasn't sure, but I think I had hit the shift she referred to. I took back what I had told Hunter about taking her time to come over and said, "I need you."

I had also been texting my friend Jennifer who had a home birth just weeks before and I wanted some affirmation that it could be done. I told her contractions were coming about 4 minutes apart. She said, "Please tell me your midwife or doula is there!!" It was right around then that I went radio silent because everything started happening so quickly. I'm not even sure I responded.

My preferred position to deal with contractions was on my hands and knees. If I was standing when one hit, I would just collapse on the floor. I was already tired by that point, which made me nervous because there was no telling how long I had left to go. I was lying on the bed in between a contraction and someone was rubbing my back. I assumed it was Justin, but when I looked up, it was Hunter. I had no idea that she or Shannon had even arrived. I was in what's called "Labor Land." It's a beautiful, oblivious place.

Shannon started blowing up and filling the birthing pool in our bedroom. If you had asked me how much time had passed between the time they got there and when the pool was ready, I would guess about 30 minutes. Apparently it was more like 2 hours. I was so excited when the pool was ready. Laboring "on land" was not doing it for me. I loved being in the warm, soothing water. Once in the pool, I fell asleep in between almost every contraction. I'd heard women say that they slept between contractions and I just couldn't imagine how that was true because it's just a couple of minutes in between. It seems weird to go to sleep for so short a time, but I believe now it's just one of God's sweet mercies during labor!

The lights were low, candles were lit. Justin had made me some beautiful affirmation posters that were hanging all around the room so that I could see them when I opened my eyes between contractions. A very calming playlist (also thanks to Justin) was playing in the background and that was very comforting.

When a contraction came, I tried to remember the coping techniques I learned in our Bradley class. I would do a scan of my body from top to bottom to make sure I wasn't tensing my body. Shannon and Hunter often had to remind me to relax my face. In my head I would picture something resembling a seismograph. As the contraction wave came, I pictured a line going up, holding steady for a little bit, then falling down again, like a bell curve. I knew it was only a matter of time before the line would fall. Each contraction was finite; it wouldn't last forever. I just had to ride the wave until it was over.

Throughout labor, I continued to vomit. I expected that, as my stomach had been revolting against me almost the entire pregnancy. I hadn't eaten anything since lunch and didn't have a chance to eat dinner before active labor started. My birth team was a well oiled machine. I would say I needed the barf bucket and within moments it would be in front of me. When I was finished, there would be a washcloth ready and my water cup in front of my mouth, ready to rehydrate.

Shannon told me I had to go to the bathroom. She said I could go in the pool or get out and go to the toilet. The thought of getting out of the tub and making it across the room seemed insurmountable. I really wanted to go in the tub, but my body wouldn't let me, so I had to get out. I'm pretty sure this is when I hit transition because the contractions were coming so quickly, I couldn't find a quiet moment to leave the toilet afterward. Finally I managed to start crawling across the bathroom. Little by little I tried to make my way back to the birthing pool. My mom arrived at this time as I was laying on the bathroom floor. I think it was around 10:30 (just in time! I delivered about an hour later!)

I asked Shannon and Hunter, "So what do I do now? I just do this forever?" Everything seemed so monotonous and repetitive. My water hadn't broken yet and I asked when that might happen. Shannon wanted to check me to see where I was. In theory I wanted to know, but there was so little down time in between contractions that I didn't want to waste what little rest I had with an uncomfortable check. I continued to crawl across the floor when I felt gushing liquid. I announced that I was wetting my pants! But no--it was my water breaking! Thank goodness we had a trail of shower curtains from the tub to the toilet.

I finally made it back to the tub and Shannon checked me--9.5 cm! I remember everyone cheering and getting excited. I was so close! I had a few more contractions then felt the urge to push. Everyone (Justin, Shannon, Hunter, Amber the birth assistant, my mom, and Abby the photographer) gathered around the tub. Justin was helping hold me up from outside the tub and his arms were getting tired. He asked if he could get in. Earlier I had told him no, but at this point I didn't care what he did. They told him to change very quickly. He got in and was able to support me (physically, mentally, and emotionally) as I pushed. Every time I felt a contraction coming on I would say, "Okay" and everyone would get into position. At one point, I think someone asked me how I felt and I said, "Okay" and remember everyone assuming their positions. I said, "I just mean okay. Not 'okay okay'!" :)

Pushing is very frustrating because you take 2 steps forward during a contraction, then 1 step (or more) back while waiting for the next one. I could feel the progress then feel him inching back in. Eventually I felt the dreaded ring of fire. That is a very accurate term. After about 25 minutes of pushing, his head came out and very shortly after, his body. His cord was wrapped around his neck twice, but I knew Shannon had everything under control. The next thing I knew, Joel was on my chest, looking up at us with his eyes wide open. He didn't even cry. Everything was just so calm and peaceful and lovely.

Physically, one of the best things about having an unmedicated birth is that you feel pretty normal again right after. I could walk and move. Baby and I were both alert because we didn't have drugs in our system. Emotionally, I felt so empowered and liberated. I could do anything!

We stayed in the pool for a little while longer, admiring Joel. Shannon said I needed sugar so I got to drink a Dr. Pepper (well-deserved, I think!) and enjoyed that very much. We wanted to do delayed cord clamping & cutting, so we let the cord pulse for awhile then got out of the pool. Joel and I took an herbal bath to help ease some postpartum discomforts. My birth team worked to clean everything up while Justin and I enjoyed Joel. You never would have known a birth had just taken place there!

I think it was around 1:30 or 2:00 that we were ready for all the grandparents to come in. We enjoyed eating Joel's birthday cookie cake and drank sparkling cider. Our parents gathered around and prayed over us. It was a really lovely birth day celebration for our baby boy.